GROTON Conn. – On a nice and sunny Wednesday afternoon, Mr. Pecka was spotted glitching and is now believed to be AI.
Lots of students have reported seeing Mr. Pecka twitching his head and having electrical sparks flying out of Mr. Pecka, as well as using too many semicolons and Oxford commas in his emails.
“I showed up to debate a little early this week, and I saw Mr. Pecka twitching uncontrollably,” said senior Megan Lacey, who is one of the debate team co-captains. “It was scary… his face looked all weird, and sparks were flying everywhere!”
Many students and teachers are starting to get concerned about Mr. Pecka’s unusual behavior, even though many people have claimed he has always been somewhat odd. There is speculation that he has always been a sentient AI chatbot but is starting to malfunction.
“Mr. Pecka has always used Oxford commas, semicolons, and even sometimes an em dash, but now it’s out of hand,” claimed an anonymous faculty member. “Now, there just isn’t a sentence where he doesn’t use advanced punctuation.”
Mr. Pecka has ended up admitting that the speculation about his origin is correct, and Pecka is an AI chatbot named P.E.C.K.A (Professional Educator, Classroom Knowledge Algorithm). P.E.C.K.A. was placed as a teacher because he is the most human-like and the best out of all the other attempts at creating other chatbots like him. P.E.C.K.A. has also revealed the reason for his sparking and malfunctioning to a student in his Journalism class, who threw a pencil at him and messed up some of P.E.C.K.A.’s wiring.
Overall, P.E.C.K.A. is a very peaceful chatbot and was made for the classroom. He will continue teaching, hopefully never malfunctioning again.
This article is a work of satire. Mr. Pecka is over the whole em dash thing.
