GROTON, Conn. – On a cloudy Monday morning, Fitch High School history teacher Mr. Crump was spotted in an unusually bright mood.

Mr. Crump, a Fitch High School History teacher, can rarely be seen flexing the muscles at the side of the oral cavity. On this Monday morning, however, he was seen flexing these muscles, also known as smiling. Many students who witnessed this event were baffled.

“Why did he look like that?” an anonymous student asked. “He was watching a funny cat video and he just… smiled!”

Other students were very disturbed and didn’t know how he was physically capable of doing that. Some even say that they refuse to believe that it was Mr. Crump. 

There are speculations that a ghost known to drink students’ tears possessed Crump. This ghost, known as the Crumpster, is said to fill a coffee mug with students’ tears before transfering the liquid to a Keurig and consuming the tear-laden coffee. This is thought to be the most accurate theory, but many others have been whispered about in the hallway. 

Sources say the history department held an emergency meeting to discuss Crump’s unprecedented mood. 

“It’s so extraordinary,” said Mr. Higgins, department chair. “I was telling my story of the Lincoln assassination, and he just strolled into my room with a huge grin. My students started gasping and screaming.”  

When approached for comment to inquire about his mood, Mr. Crump just smiled eerily at our reporters until they slowly backed away like Homer Simpson into the bushes.

This article is a work of satire. Mr.Crump has never genuinely smiled a day in his life.